I only say this because in a lot of respects woman are completely out of this world with their thinking. I only realized this the other day when my husband and I got to talking the differences between men and women. Not just obvious differences (yes I realize boys have a penis and girls have a vagina)but the differences in our relationships with other people, more specifically with our friends. After our conversation I was enlightened to the differences and was a little surprised at just how things really are. I don't want to betray my gender but women can be really ridiculous when it comes to friendships and keeping them. This is the only time that I think that men have it completely right.
Men have friends and men will keep those friends for years. I'm not talking just a couple of years, but like they've been friends since they were in diapers, years. They might compete in everything from who has the better car to who gets the hot girl, but in the long run, men have friendships that will stand the test of time and these guys would do anything for eachother. They are genuinly there for eachother through the hard times, the good times, the bad times and they just enjoy hanging out doing nothing but watching TV. They won't go out of their way to screw eachother over just for the joy of seeing what would happen. When they have a diagreement, they won't end the friendship. They might not talk for a couple of days, but they do make up and the friendship goes on. If a friend of theirs calls them some derogotory name they come up with something equally bad until they go back and forth so many times that they do it to make themselves laugh. It becomes a game and all meaness goes out the window.There are few things that will cause men to end their relationships with their friends. Those few things will be a deal breaker for anyone. (Cheating with the others spouse, murder...you get the drift...all the REALLY bad stuff.)
Women, well they're a totally different breed. How many of you can truely say that you have had a female friend that you have known all of your life? You might have one but chances are the majority of us do not and the friend that we have known the longest we have only known for a couple of years. Women have a tendency to write people off if they don't do, say, or agree with everthing that we believe in. We have an ability to end a friendship over something dumb that can be forgiven and forgotten but instead we drag out the cat fight looking for more reasons why we shouldn't be friends with that person anymore. We let our relationships with our guys interfere with our relationships with our girls. How many of you stopped hanging out with a friend because you just started dating a guy or the guy you have been dating doesn't like that certain friend? Don't feel bad, we have all done it. But we shouldn't. We go out of our way to try and make eachother look bad but act like the victim when things don't work out the way we thought they would. We pretend to be nice to eachother but constantly talk eachother down behind one another's back. We will talk a guy down to our friend until that friend loses interest in him and then go behind their backs and date that guy. In a lot of cases this behavior will completely end a friendship. The ridiculous thing is the girl that down talked the guy and started dating him will tell her new ex-friend "you snooze you lose". Maybe not exactly that phrase but one like it. Sometimes we will find that one true friend that we would go out of our way for and then something in us changes and we do everything we can to push that person away. I think it comes down to the fact that we think they know too much about us and we are paranoid that they will use what they know against us. Why do we think this? Because we are all guilty of doing it. What we need to do is take a page from the book that the boys go from......maybe then we can all have a longtime friend that we can trust. We can build the friendships that we all want. Trusting, lasting, and never judging.
I have been told on several occasions that I'm part dude. All of my husbands friends think I have a mans brain because I understand what they do, why they do it and I still accept them for who they are. My husband told me the same thing when we had the discussuion on this very topic. I have a couple of close girlfriends and the rest are all guys....why? Because a lot of girls and myself don't get along because of the behavior descibed above. I don't understand how women can treat eachother this way. I've had it done to me and I'm sad for the fact that I have lost quite a few really good friends because they felt the need to do everthing I have talked about. I'm not innocent by any means and I will admit I have my moments that I can be catty but when it realy comes down to it I do my best to treat my friends with the respect that they deseve. I have managed to keep a couple of friendships for 10 years or better and my friends and I work on those friendships to keep them happy.
In closing, all I'm saying is follow the golden rule and treat others the way you want to be treated. When you find that friend that you really trust, don't push them away because you think they know too much about you and if you do hear about a friend talking badly about you when you aren't around, go to them and talk to them about it instead of believing what everyone else tells you. You may find that there are two sides to every story. Until next time.......
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