Sunday, May 26, 2013

The Big Move

     Yay!!  I'm back!!!  I realize that it's been a looooong time since I have posted anything, I moved and I live in an area that doesn't have Internet service available through any company.  Yes, there are still areas like that, no I can't believe it either.  So with my Internet blackout looking like it's going to be a permanent thing I have found other ways to get my fabulous posts to all of you.  I'm not going to reveal how because well we'll just say I got around it.
     So today the topic up for discussion is "The Big Move" aka. moving in with your significant other.  I have come to find out recently, that thee are still a LARGE group of people out there that go with tradition and not move in with their other half until they are married.  There is a really BIG part of me that finds this the dumbest thing in the world to do and if its done the relationship is already doomed.  I completely understand that for a lot of you its because of religion or law, that can't be helped, but if you are like me and are not restrained by any of that you have no excuse.
     The first boyfriend I ever lived with my mom got on me about living with him and not being married.  She told me it was a sin and I shouldn't do it.  My mom was raised Catholic and so was I but some time during the teen years we stopped going to church and doing "churchy" things.  I didn't stop believing in God but I didn't agree with all the rules, mainly this one.  Now let me remind you, this is all my personal opinion and I'm going to apologize now if anyone is offended, but I refuse to marry some one if I haven't lived with them for at least a year if not longer.  My reason why?  Because you never truly get to know someone until you lived with that person.  You get to see all of their nasty habits, like if they leave their clothes scattered everywhere or if they like to pick their nose and wipe it on the carpet.  You get to help do their laundry and see if they were taught properly how to wipe their ass.  Most importantly, if you get into an argument with that person you have no place else to go. ( except maybe the corner bar ) You live with that person, so you have no other place to run because it's your home too.  Now I know that you're thinking that you could just go back home to your parents or go to a friends house, wrong.  You might think that you can until the situation comes up and then a stubborn streak will hit you and the fight escalates to "Fuck you, I live here too, you leave."  This statement generally leads to some one going into the bedroom and grabbing blankets and a pillow to camp out on the couch.  Unfortunately for most of you guys, you are the ones doing the couch camping. Women are pros at keeping the bed in their possession with most of the bedding intact.  Living with a new person is hard.  You could know that person most of your life but until you have lived with them you know nothing about that person.
     My advice to all of you is COMPROMISE.  You have to, you have no other way around it.  If you want to make the relationship work and marry this person one day, you will have to make small sacrifices.  Girls, you will have to condense your wardrobe to make room for him in your closet. (Unless you have two and then no sharing is needed, unless you have stuff in the second one too.)  Boys, you will have to deal with girly soaps and shampoo and little candles and knick nacks everywhere.  We're girls that's what we do.  Try not to nag each other too much about the small stuff and equally as possible share the chores.  When it comes to the fighting, there's only one way to do it....NAKED.  Try to fight naked.  You can't do it I promise you.  I know, I've tried.  You get too distracted by the pure nakedness of the other person and it will lead to two things, 1) a momentary truce to where you both grudge fuck the fuck out of the other person and by the time you are done you're not angry anymore or 2) you make up say you're sorry and truly mean it and then have make-up sex.  ( There is a difference between the two, trust me.)  If you can 85% of the time you are living with your significant other and you don't want to kill them then you are doing good and on the fast track for being ready for the real scary commitment of MARRIAGE. ARGHHHHHHHHHH!!!!  If you are thinking that even though you have spent the year or more living with that person that marriage won't change things, you are sorely mistaken. But that is a blog for another time....
     So in closing, live together first if you can.  It's the best advice that I can give you.  It will make or break your relationship but you will know for real real if you and that person are meant to go for the long haul.   So my faithful readers, Until next time.............
   

Sunday, October 28, 2012

All my favorites........

     OK, so I will apologize now because this entry is going to be a shameless plug for all the fashion and beauty sites that I have found and have come to love.  We all have them....that one website that has a bunch of cool tips and cute things that we love, so we check it on a regular basis.  I have a couple that if you haven't ever been on the site you should check out.
     So the first one is a blog called polishandpearls.com.  The girl that runs the blog, Jen, is adorable and has a great personality.  She also has a couple of channels on youtube that I watch regularly.  If you want to see those I think you can find the links on the blog page.   Basically what she does is goes out and finds products that she likes while she is shopping and then posts her opinions about them.  She has everything from brand name high end items to drugstore finds and everything in between.  She talks about clothes, hair, make-up, jewelry, and my favorite, nail polish.  This girls collection of polishes is positively insane.  She also does make-up tutorials, hair tutorials and nail design tutorials.  Everything is cute and fun and I love it!!!
     Another site I frequent is a blog on blogger called a girl and her polish.  She posts different nail designs she has done and what colors and brands she used to do them.  She also showcases different collections of different brands of polish.  Some of her designs are really pretty and all the colors she uses are fantastic!!
     Keeping with the nail design talk the next site I'm going to tell you about is a channel I watch frequently on youtube called cutepolish.  I believe you can also find this girl on twitter, facebook, instagram and a few other places on the net.  Cutepolish (or the girl in the videos that we still have no idea what she looks like) showcases a plethora of adorable and easy nail designs.  She takes ideas from her subscribers and fans and comes up with a design that only takes a couple of minutes to create.  She now even has he own top and base coat that she sells!!!  Her designs go from adorable to chic and everything else in between.  I've tried a couple of her designs and they look amazing!!!  She posts a new design every Sunday (usually, sometimes Monday) and as far as I have seen, answers any and all questions that her fans and subscribers may have to ask.  She also recently started promoting Disney and once or twice a month comes out with a Disney inspired design.  Awesome!!
  The last two I am going to tell you about are two that I actually fell in love with just this morning.  Thank you to Jen from polishandpearls.com for getting me hooked.  One is called youbeauty.com.  Youbeauty is one of those sites that has tips and discussuons about EVERYTHING!!!!!  Beauty, relationships...you name it they pretty much cover it and they have a TON of quizzes that you can take if you like to take quizzes. (Lord knows I do!!)  The other is called littleblackbag.com.  This site is cool and as soon as I get the money to I am bound and determined to try it out.  When you sign in to this site it asks a bunch of questions about what styles you like, make-up, accessories...etc.  Then what you do is you pick either the $49.99 or the $29.99 option and look through what their stylists have put together for based on your tastes.  Once you pick one or two items they put them in a virtual "bag".  When you check out they give you a couple more items at random based on your tastes in your bag.  You get a couple of days to trade and swap items in your bag with other people before your items get shipped to you.  The great part about it is you are only paying the $29 or $49 and getting items that are worth almost twice that!!!  Brand name stuff that you probably wouldn't normally spend a ton of money on is what you are getting for one low price!!!  How AWESOME is that???!!!!  I love to shop so to me this is a dream come true!!! 
     So that's all I have for you ladies....I hope you check out some of these sites and enjoy them as much as I do...Until next time......

Monday, September 17, 2012

The Hair Affair

     How many of my readers out there have luscious long hair?  How many of you have short hair?  How many of you have a haircut that you aren't sure about but you keep because you are afraid to do anything else with?   It's amazing how attached to our hair we can get.  Depending on what we can make it do and how we feel with it, we can feel everything from feeling like a Victoria's Secret model to the cute girl next door and everything in between.  Some of us find a hair cut that we are comfortable with and absolutely love, others spend a while changing styles and lengths looking for that perfect cut that makes us feel fabulous.  Then there are those few who have had long hair all their lives and are afraid to cut it because that's how they identify themselves.  This used to be me.
     OK, let me be honest, I didn't realize that I was identifying myself with my long hair.  I had really long hair when I was in high school.  Long, being that the ends of my hair brushed my belt line of my pants that were low riders to begin with.  When I decided to become a runner and do track and cross country I cut it to the middle of my back to make it more manageable.  A short time later I came to the realization that it was still to heavy to run with and cut it to my shoulders.  I liked the cut, it was a cut little bob, the ends curled under on their own without any styling and I could still pull it back into a pony tail for sports.  Feeling confident, I would go about my regular day until one day I was mistaken for someone else on a couple different occasions because I wasn't recognized because I cut my hair and looked like everyone else.  This got to me.  I was always been known for the long hair that I had, until that point, for the previous 10 years.  I hated the idea of being mistaken for someone else instead of being recognized for me.  I decided to start letting my hair grow back out determined to get it long again.  I did this for a few years then I would cut it convinced that I liked it better short, then I would run into someone I knew and they would gush over how cute my hair looks but how gorgeous it was when I let it grow long.  I went back and forth like this for years.  A couple of months ago I looked at my husband and asked him what I should do with my hair because the maintenance and the random lost strands were getting ridiculous.  My hair was just past the mid of my back at this point.  He told me to shave my head and laughed.  I told him no way, to which he replied that he always thought I looked cute with short hair.  I decided to go for it, I figured that if my hubs thought I was cute with short hair then I could do it.  I went and got it cut to my shoulders and layered.  It looked good and received rave reviews from the hubby who was relieved that he wouldn't be pulling 2 foot long hairs out of his shirts anymore.  I liked it and I felt good about it.  It was easy to style and I could still get it to pull up into a wimpy pony.  Last week however, I noticed how much it had grown in the last couple of months and wanted to get it cut again.  Once again, I asked the hubby for his opinion and he told me that it was my hair and to do what I want.  I showed him a picture of a cute isometric cut that was on Pinterest.  He told me to go for it.  So I did...... I LOVE IT!!!!!   After I got it cut, I sent him a picture with my phone.  He said he liked it and that i have always looked good with short hair.  He also said that I have always identified myself with my long hair, to which I replied that the long hair always made me feel like a Victoria's Secret model.  You want to knw what he said to me?  My wonderful husband said to me that I was a Victoria Secret model, just one that didn't have time to fuck with her hair.  I love him.  But it was the comment he made about me identifying myself that stuck with me.  I always felt that to feel like me and to feel pretty I had to have long hair and I realize I don't.  I know I'm not the only person out there that has felt this way either. (Hairdressers wouldn't make the money they do if I was.)  So I sit here with my cute and fab hair cut feeling sexxy telling all the other beautiful women out there that feel that same way I did to take a chance and try a new hair cut if you think it will make you feel amazing.  If you have had long hair all your life and you want to try a short style, do it, hair grows back.  If you don't like the new cut grow it out.  Try everything.......We constantly change our nail color, our clothes, hair color evey thing....why not try a new hairstyle?
     So I leave you all with this.....Do as you will with your head, throw caution to the wind and try that drastic new cut, because you just might like it.  If you don't, the great thing about hair is that it always grows back for you to try something new with it again.  make yourself look as beautiful as you feel. Until next time........

Friday, August 31, 2012

Men are from Mars, Women are from Pluto Part 2!!!!

     You didn't know that a blog could have a sequel did you?  Well, in my world they can.  The reason is well, if I would have put everything in the first half of this blog then I would have gone on for days.....this way I can break it up a little and change topic without losing my reader's interest.  Seriously let's face it,  most of us have the attention span of a 2 year old.  We need new things after a certain amount of time. So this is where part two comes in and where it will begin.....
     Sex.  We all think about it, most of us are doing it, and I'm hoping that everyone loves it.  One question that has plagued women everywhere, why do people cheat?  I have a couple of answers to that question.  The reason I have a couple is because one reason doesn't cover every situation.  The differences between men and women cause different answers to that question.  This is where the big differences between men and women come in as well.
     When it comes to sex, women are in it for love.  I don't give a rat's ass what anyone tells you, women are always in it for love whether or not they want to admit it.  We can not separate emotion from just sex.  We always throw our heart into it even if we don't want to.  We can say all we want is sex from a man and we will make ourselves believe it, but deep down that person is more than just a fuck buddy.  (Friend with benefits, booty call...etc you get the drift.)  So we set up these rules with this other person and then we break the no emotional attachment rule that we are usually the first ones to mention.  Then, we proceed to get angry when he decides to start dating other people as well as dating you, because we have developed this emotional attachment to this person  that we said we only wanted a sexual relationship with.   We call him every name in the book, cause a huge fight and are just as hurt as we would be if we were in an actual relationship with this person.  They think we are crazy, call us all the names in the book and ask why we started anything with them in the first place when the agreement was not to get emotionally attached.  We complain to our friends that he was an asshole and he tells his friends that bitches are crazy and nothing is resolved.   Now when you are in an actual committed relationship, you and your object of affection are great for a few months, doing everything together, making kissy faces in public, and all the other stuff that couples do that makes the rest of the world gag and yell "get a room!!"  Eventually the Disney movie love wears off and you are in a serious sexual relationship with another person with all the commitment that goes along with it.  So why do girls cheat?  Because something in a lot of us can never truly settle down with just one person and be happy.  We will nit pick and look for every thing we can to find something wrong with the person we are with.  Once we find one little fault, its almost always a deal breaker.  We can still be with this person in a relationship and be on the prowl for something we might think is better.  (Chances are very good that its not and the person you are with is everything you are looking for.)  Once we find that someone else, its all a tragic fall that spirals out of control and turns into an affair that we later realize wasn't worth the relationship that we threw away by cheating.  How does the other person find out about the affair you ask?  Because girls are stupid and we either put ourselves in a position that we get caught or we feel guilty and we tell the truth.  There is no way around it.  Secrets are something that we are genetically programmed to not be able to keep.  World war 3 happens and we just ruined possibly the best relationship that we will ever have with out any hope of salvage.  How can we prevent this from happening?  DON'T CHEAT!!!!!!  It's not hard, just don't do it.  Chances are that no other man is going to be better than the one that you found and feel like you can't live without.  If that man treats you like your a goddess, tells you you are beautiful everyday, tells you I love you multiple times a day and would do anything for you ( slay dragons, defend your honor...etc) then he is worth keeping. So if you think you may have found something better.....you didn't....don't do it.
     Men on the other hand are a different story.  Some of them are like women and are on the prowl for something better, which they don't find and end up screwing up that best thing that ever came into their lives. Some of them are just plain stupid and think that they are capable of keeping a secret from several different girls that they are fucking and then they get caught and try to come up with a lame ass excuse as to why it happened.  The excuse never works and they are either left totally alone or end up with one or two of the girls still willing to fight for him. (These types of girls are seriously fucking stupid and should be shot.  He cheated once...he will do it again.)  Then, you have the vast majority of men who will be straight and admit that the only reason that they cheated was because its an animal instinct.  Its the drive in men to be able to try an stick their dicks into as many women as possible before they die.  There is no love, no emotion involved.  Men have the ability to separate sex and love.  They can just have sex with a girl and not have any feelings for her and then go home to the woman they love that stole their heart away and be happy.  Its sort of like a parallel universe.  Now, I'm not saying that because of this ridiculous ability that men were given, it's by any means an excuse for cheating, but it kind of explains the motive behind it all.
     Before you begin to lose all hope, there are a small population of men on this planet that can commit to a woman and she is all he will ever need.  The thought of cheating may cross his mind, but he will never act on it because he know that he would be ruining  the best thing that he ever found.  He appreciates everything that you do for him and will do everything in his power to make you feel like the goddess that he knows you are.  These men ladies, are the ones that you need to find and keep.  I found mine and I will never let him go.  I would clone him if I could....I would make a killing.  He is my best friend and soul mate and I don't know where or who I would be with out him. If you find a man like my husband, KEEP HIM!!!!
     So in closing, I say this, the above reading are the differences between men and women and they reasons why we cheat.  Use it as a lesson to learn not to or as a guide to find and stay away from those who do....cheating never did anyone any good and it never will.  Until Next Time.......

Friday, July 6, 2012

The Lingering Memory

     I know what you're thinking....the lingering memory of what?  I'm referring to the lingering memory or memories of the past relationships that you have had or events in your life (even the simple ones) and how they can come back to the forefront of your brain with no warning.  It might just take a song on the radio, a smell of a room, the way someone looks at you and soon you find yourself remembering that person that you may not have thought about for, sometimes,  years.  It doesn't matter if you are in the best relationship of your life, one little trigger will take you back to that person and time, leaving you wondering why you would even think of that now.  It happens to all of us.  You can sit and read this and think to yourself that it never happens to you, but just as you say that some memory of an old boyfriend/girlfriend or best friend will pop into your brain.  Did you ever notice how much time can go by when that happens?  You can seriously lose an hour of your life that you didn't know you lost until you snap out of the memory trance.
     This happens to me all the time.  A lot of the time its just a song that will trigger it.  Some of the memories are happy, some are sad, some I wish I could just plain forget.  (Those are usually the ones that involve my ex husband).  Don't get me wrong my ex and I had some fun times but when I look back on them all I realize that entire time we were together he decided that I wasn't enough and fucked anything that would let him near them.  The bitch of it all was that I knew half of the people that he cheated on me with and they all knew that he was married.  The bad part is that now I'm insecure about myself and most of the grievances I have towards my wonderful husband now are because of the stupid memories of my ex doing that same thing.  An example....My husband plays C.O.D on Xbox quite often, my ex constantly played Socom on PlayStation...the difference between them, while my ex totally ignored me while he was gaming no matter what I did, my husband makes sure he comes up to kiss me or hug me or even talk to me while he is playing because he knows what my ex used to do and promised me he wouldn't be the same way.  That doesn't keep the memory at bay but it helps.  A song on the radio or on my ipod will take me back to my first high school boyfriend and all the fun that we used to have.  I can honestly say I have no romantic feelings for him anymore but I can defiantly lose myself in some of those old memories of a simpler time.  I can walk into a store that sells candles or incense and I remember my trip that I took to India and the way the inside of the hotel smelled, rich with incense and curry, the best smell to wake up to in the morning.  The smell of coffee and bacon takes me back to my childhood and Sunday morning breakfast.  My dad always cooked breakfast for us and played Pat Methany, Robert Johnson, Simon and Garfunkel and whatever else he had in his record collection while he cooked.  A visit to my favorite place will bring back the painful memory of my first real crush and my first broken heart.  It really doesn't take a lot, if you really think about it, to trigger an old memory.  Like Clint Black said in one of his songs, " Ain't it funny how a melody can bring back a memory, Take you to another place in time, Completely change your state of mind."
     So in this short little post I will just say this....Indulge in those little moments.  It's those moments in time that you remember that you always learn from.  Good or bad there is a reason that those memories have the trigger that they do.  One word of good advice though, don't do it while you're driving if you can help it.  God forbid that the memory causes an accident or something else like that, anywhere else, daydream away!!
Until Next Time...........

Saturday, June 23, 2012

Fifty Shades Of....Oh Hell Yes!!!!!

   Warning: Graphic Language is in this blog, if you get offended easily I strongly suggest that you don't read!!

   This time this entry is going to be more than just a blog, it's going to border on book review.  I, like millions of other women out there, finally read the Fifty Shades Trilogy and am now obsessed with these books.  How do I know that millions of others are reading it too you ask?  These books have held the top four sales spots for book sales for the past few months.  Maybe even longer, I really don't know for sure.  All I know is that these books are amazing and I think every woman on the planet needs to indulge herself and read them!!!
     I honestly don't remember where I heard about Fifty Shades but I was ultimately interested when I heard that it started out as a fan fiction based off of the characters of Twilight. ( If you have been following and reading this blog I have randomly dropped hints that I am a Twilight fanatic as well.)  So I, like any other person, googled this information and found the fan fiction in question.  Now, for those of you who have no clue what fan fiction is, I will enlighten you.  Fan Fiction are stories that fans of books or movies have created to either put their own twist on the same story, take the story further than the book/movie did or use the same characters as the original but make the story their own.  This is what E.L. James did with the Fifty Shades Trilogy.  She took the characters from Twilight and wrote them into her own story. When she decided that she wanted more than just a post on a web site she changed a few things, the characters names and BOOM!!  Fifty Shades Trilogy is born!! Halleluiah!!!!!!  Mommy Porn is born!!!!  After reading the fan fiction aptly named Master of the Universe, I had to read the books.....the obsession was born.
     The whole story stars out with a young college girl, Anastasia Steele, who gets stuck doing an interview with a handsome, young business mogul, Christian Grey, as a favor to her flu ridden roomate.  Anastasia is immediately taken with Christian but denies her feelings until she is asked to coffee by Christian at a photo shoot she arranged so there would be photos to go with the interview that was going to be published in the college paper.  At this point the lurid yet delicious affair between Christian and Anastasia begins leaving women everywhere wanting their own Christian Grey.
     SPOILER ALERT!!!!!!  If you haven't read the books yet and don't want to know what happens until you do I suggest that you close this page out now.....For those of you still with me....Time to get freaky!!!!  What makes the affair and eventual relationship between Christian and Ana so delicious and keeps us wanting more is the forbidden nature of it.  Christian is waaayyyy into BDSM.  If you don't know what that is think whips, paddles and handcuffs mixed with awesome sex.  There is more to it of course but well, you get the idea.   Then a shocking truth is revealed, Ana is a virgin.  This a truth that readers and Christian weren't expecting, but being the sexy and irresistible man that he turns out to be he remedies that situation with Ana's full consent.  This is all after he reveals his intentions, makes her sign an NDA, and shows her what is affectionately referred to as the "red room of pain."  As Ana looks around this room she promptly thinks "it feels like I’ve time-traveled back to the sixteenth century and the Spanish Inquisition."   I will leave out the details of what she saw in this room but what was seen scared her and turned her on all at the same time. And so the sexy, torturous love affair between the submissive and her dominant begins, leaving all of us exploring the possibility that we want to maybe try out the "red room of pain."    The sex scenes are plentiful with every woman wishing that they had sex 10 times a day and their boyfriends/husbands wondering where the sudden jump in their partners libido is coming from but not complaining because, well they're guys and sex occupies their minds ALL THE TIME.   This wonderfully sexy novels do have a story line to them, everything from Ana overcoming a couple of Christians previous partners to an obsessive ex-boss that tries to kill them both.  In the end, Ana finally gets her happily ever after.....Married to Christian and at the very end pregnant with her second child. Swoon!!!!!!!
     I loved every second of these books and don't recommend reading them unless you have a boyfriend, husband or even a fuck buddy.  They will turn you on and you will want to have sex.  If you read them and don't have one of those three humans I have mentioned above well you know what other options you have, either go without and deal with the feelings of desire and sexiness or take the route that every man takes and rub one out!!!  (Although that doesn't always help either. )   This book is gonna make you want to as Christian Grey said to Ana " I don't make love...I fuck...hard."  Trust me, I did.  My libido was on overdrive in the four days that I was reading these books.  My husband didn't complain. (obviously, what man would while they have a woman so crazed with desire that they have the urge to fuck him every which way from sunday.)  E.L James did a fantastic job reaching into every woman's brain and pulling out those innermost, forbidden fantasies that none of us will ever really do and putting it on paper for us to read about.  Men have their Playboys and Hustler and Porn, we have Christian Grey in unbuttoned, ripped jeans with a riding crop!!!!  Face it ladies, as strong willed and independent as we think we are we all wanted Christian to dominate us at some point and time, and would have let him do ANYTHING he wanted.
     So in closing, READ THESE BOOKS!!!  Get lost for a few hours in the sexy world that E.L. James created for us and if needed get to know yourself a little better!!!  Until next time..........

Saturday, May 5, 2012

Ahhhh.....Young Love......*Sigh*

     I was sitting at work with my friend Stephanie and One Time by Justin Beiber came on my ipod that we were listening to.  Yes, I can hear all the dreaded gasps and comments of "OMG you have Justin Beiber on your iPod!!!!"  Yes I do.  Just that one song.  Why do I have just that one song?  I think its cute.  it was done before his voice changed so he still has that cute teenager voice and the song is about teenage love.  While listening to the song I looked at Stephanie and I told her my realization:  Love is never truer than it is when you are 15 years old.  Don't get me wrong love is very true when you are older as well but its not the same kind of love.
     When you are 15, if you're anything like me, it's usually the age you start seriously dating and that first real boyfriend comes into the picture.  (Some of you may have started out sooner but I didn't....late bloomer I guess)  With that first boyfriend comes all the things that go with a first love.  The constant butterflies, the hourly, lengthy phone conversations, the dread of being away from that other person for more than a few minutes and the snuggling.  In my case, that first real kiss came into the picture. (like I said, late bloomer)  Nothing else in the world matters but you and that other person.  No complications of cheating, sex, or any other obstacle that you have to defend yourself against when you are in a more mature relationship.  Everything is all bubblegum and rainbows.  You make each other cards on valentines day and your boyfriend doesn't mind getting a cute little teddy bear that says I love you on it.  Sitting with each other on the couch holding hands and cuddling is all you need to keep you safe and happy.  During the school day you pass notes to each other in the hallways proclaiming how much you love that other person and how you would just simply die with out them.  The kisses are sweeter, softer and mean so much more than any thing you have ever felt.  They leave you feeling giddy and wanting more.  The love between you two is pure and uncomplicated.  Its sometimes the only time in your life that you can truly be with someone and not be anyone but who you are.  That other person loves you for you and no other reason.  Then the hormones of the lovesick teenager kick in.....and this is where EVERYTHING get screwed up.
     Nothing ruins a wonderful first love better than sex.  At 15 or 16 we have all these racing hormones and desires and don't have a clue what the hell to do them.  This is where we get the bright idea or ruining a good thing with sex.  90% of the time its the boy that mentions it.  They then leave it up to the girl if they are going to have sex or not.  Some guys pressure and others are very calm about it.  What we don't realize at this age is that sex is wonderful and horrible all at the same time.  It's wonderful because it makes you feel good and brings you closer to that other person.  If you are truly in love it will bring you closer and make you fall even harder for that person.  The bad side to it is that it complicates things by making the little things like holding hands and making out not mean as much as it used to.  Before you has sex those things were enough to calm the desires for that other person, now it doesn't work as well as it used to and sex is the only way to quench this desire.  This leaves a lot of young couples thinking that the only reason they are together is because of the sex because they forget the real reason they fell in love in the first place.  The fighting begins and the cute teenage relationship turns into World War III.  Break-ups ensue and you sometimes never talk to that person again.
     As you grow up, you find someone that brings the butterflies again.  Even though they aren't the same butterflies that you got at 15, they are still the ones that tell you that you like and could love this person you've met.  Through out your courtship, the hand holding, making out, and cuddling happen but the way all of these made you feel at 15 is lost and the more mature desire kicks in.  The love making happens and the falling in love begins.  The butterflies disappear but a stronger feeling of love and attachment kicks in and even though its not the same love as it was when you were 15 its just as strong.  Eventually you will get married and maybe have a family.  The relationship between you and your husband is strong and you could never imagine yourself with another man, but one day while you are just sitting alone or cleaning up your first love will pop into your head and you will reminisce about the days when things were simple and just a kiss would give you butterflies.
     So in closing all I have to say is this......Even though you are perfectly happy with your marriage or relationship that you are in its OK to remember a simpler time when kisses meant more and a hand holding yours would give you those happy butterflies.....until next time.......