This has been a common debate amongst the female population. Don't believe me? I heard a debate about it on my favorite morning radio show!! Do women like a hairy man or would we prefer that they waxed (or shaved) it all off. Well the answer to that lies with the woman. It's their choice. Yes, I realize that men have the choice but if they know what we like they are more than likely to do what we want. Why? Because if we like it then they're going to get laid. (don't deny it you know they will.) It depends on the woman on what they find sexier.
The hair debate has been going on for ages and I'm pretty sure has been talked about on every women's gossip show on the planet at one point in time. Do women prefer their men to have body hair or not? My personal opinion? I love it! Now, I'm not talking gross hairy, I don't like if a man is so hairy he would rival Chewbacca. I don't wanna live with a Sasquatch. All I'm talking about is hair on the chest, a little down to the belly button and maybe a little on his back. The hair on the chest has to have a decent covering too, not just a few little hairs that they are proud of, but an even covering. Maybe a little showing out of the collar of their shirt but you don't want to see what looks like a small kitten trying to escape. The back hair should be there but just on the shoulder blades, maybe down the sides a little, and not thick. You don't want to have enough there to be able to brush and style. Just enough that you know its there. Now, if you're like me and you love everything I have just described, a man with these attributes will completely irresistible to you. I believe that the hair makes the man, you are not a real man unless you have it. The first time i saw my husband take his shirt off I was in awe and a completely changed woman. I used to be a girl that thought chest hair was gross. Just the thought of it made me just....ewwwwww. Then that first time he took his shirt off I was never more turned on in my life. He had hair on his chest and I was just unbelievably just....wow. I was literally speechless. I was converted and I loved it. I do understand that there are guys out there that just can't grow any hair on their chest. I knew a guy that could only grow three hairs and that's it. That doesn't make them any less of a man because of genetics. That simply puts them into the group of guys that women who don't like the hair.
There are a lot of women out there who unlike myself and a few others would prefer a smooth hairless chest, back and otherwise. Now I can see the attraction, with a hairless chest you get to see the true muscle definition and you can lay your head on his chest with out having hair in your face. If he tans, his chest will tan evenly with out hair getting in the way. The six pack abs that he might have will be truly visible. I can vision all of you ladies now just picturing what I have described and I can guarantee that at one point in the thought you just had you either licked or slightly bit your bottom lip or both. Don't be embarrassed. We all do it. Every single one of has, does and still will. Even those of us, like me who prefer the hair, can appreciate the view. The guys will make sure they stay that way too, because they know that if their girl looks at them that way they have the excellent possibility of getting some of the best sex of their lives. And you know they do. Guys will put themselves through the pain of waxing, razor burn from shaving and try hair removal creams to keep us satisfied if that's what we like. They're not completely dumb. (a little but not totally)
So in closing, I know that this one is a little short and that's why I am going to leave things open for discussion!!! Let me know what you prefer and why. Tell your friends to read this and have them comment. Who knows there may be a part two to this blog.....Until then.......
Saturday, February 25, 2012
Sunday, February 12, 2012
For the Love of a Nerd
I know what you are thinking by reading this title.....ewwwww nerds!!!! That's right this whole blog today will be about the people we call "nerds" and how they are greatly underestimated. Being considered a nerd myself all through high school, (at least I thought I was....) I can almost call myself an expert on the subject. A lot of people still consider me a nerd to this day because of the interests and hobbies that I enjoy. What people don't know is that those we consider nerds are probably some of the best friends that you can have and in a lot of cases the best lovers. (speaking from a girls perspective about nerdy guys....really not sure about the other way around.)
So like I said, all through high school I thought myself to be considered a nerd. I was smart, did my own thing and never really hung out with the popular crowd. Take all of those factors into account and the label was formed. None of my friends were considered popular either...."nerds" as well. We did our own thing and had a great time. As I got older I reconnected with my high school best friend ( yes a guy) and we ended up dating and getting married. "Awwwwww you married your high school sweetheart..." Yes, yes I did and I have never been happier. My husband was a part of our group of "nerds" in high school and after getting to really know him I found out just how far the nerdyness went.
He is BIG in video games and probably has played every game on the planet at least once at one point in time or another. He is really big into role playing, not the same role playing that you are thinking of, but role playing like dungeons and dragons. I have to admit I kinda giggled when I heard that until he got me to play once and now I'm hooked. I know that you are laughing right now but when you have an overactive imagination like I do this game is perfect. Its not much different from playing video games but its all on paper and using your imagination rather that relying on a computer to add all your traits and scores for you. I usually describe it to people as a group of people sitting around a table telling a story. You have worksheets to keep track of items, traits, hit points, weapons and other various things that help you character you created and are playing. There are dice involved, not just regular six sided dice that we are all used to but like ten and twenty sided ones that I had never seen nor did I know they existed until I started playing. You get as many people that you can and have a blast. You'll never know how fun it is until you try it once. He was big into Warhammer which is role playing but you buy and make the little figurines and the landscapes on which to play. This is all done on table top. I never got into playing the game but I loved sitting down and painting the figurines. He loves to read and between the two of us we have enough books to stock a small library. He doesn't dress in the latest fashions instead , he wears what he is comfortable in. So according to the stereotype of nerd, he fits the profile. What most don't know is that even though he is a guy and still has a little bit of those guy tendencies, he's an amazing husband. He's loving, caring, supportive and last but not least amazing in the sack!!!
The point I want to make here is, a lot of us girls don't give the "nerdy" guys a chance because they aren't popular, aren't always the handsomest and some are into stuff that we turn our noses up at because we are afraid to stray from the norm and try new things. So, we continue to push our loyal nerd guy friends off to the side and go for the "popular" guy. You know, handsome, athletic, six pack and an ego that rivals the size of Jupiter type of guy that ALWAYS breaks your heart. (mostly because his ego is the size of Jupiter!!) Then we wonder what we did wrong. What we did wrong is push the nice guy away (nerd) and go for what society tells us is beautiful. I have been hanging out with my husband and all of his friends for almost ten years and I don't think I have ever met a more friendly, loyal, and down to earth crowd in my life. They met me once and instantly they accepted me no questions asked and would be there for me if I ever needed anything. That's how it should be for everyone. This world would be a better place if we were all accepted for who we are and not who we should be.
I also know that those guys we consider nerds might not be the handsomest boys on the planet but if you find them sexy then who cares what other people think?? I used to be picked on all the time by a girl I used to work with about my husband. She didn't know what I saw in him. I didn't care. Yes he may be a red head with a temper to match, covered in freckles from head to toe, not have six pack abs and have a chest covered in hair, but I still find him irresistble. (and aren't real men supposed to have hairy chests and not shaved ones anyway??) As long as he's as fantastic as he is to me and I find him sexy, bullocks to what everyone else thinks. I have also come to find out that nerds can also be better lovers than your average man. They are more concerned with what they are doing and how they are making you feel rather than most guys who are in a race with you to have an orgasm and how they look doing it. Nerds, at least from my experience, like to make sure you are satisfied before they worry about themselves. They also like to cuddle. Now I want to reiterate that this doesn't cover all nerds and there are probably some out there that are just like your regular to average douchebag. I am only going by my experiences.
So in closing, in the words of Bob Dylan (well not exactly), all I am saying is give nerds a chance. You might be surprised at what you find......until next time......
So like I said, all through high school I thought myself to be considered a nerd. I was smart, did my own thing and never really hung out with the popular crowd. Take all of those factors into account and the label was formed. None of my friends were considered popular either...."nerds" as well. We did our own thing and had a great time. As I got older I reconnected with my high school best friend ( yes a guy) and we ended up dating and getting married. "Awwwwww you married your high school sweetheart..." Yes, yes I did and I have never been happier. My husband was a part of our group of "nerds" in high school and after getting to really know him I found out just how far the nerdyness went.
He is BIG in video games and probably has played every game on the planet at least once at one point in time or another. He is really big into role playing, not the same role playing that you are thinking of, but role playing like dungeons and dragons. I have to admit I kinda giggled when I heard that until he got me to play once and now I'm hooked. I know that you are laughing right now but when you have an overactive imagination like I do this game is perfect. Its not much different from playing video games but its all on paper and using your imagination rather that relying on a computer to add all your traits and scores for you. I usually describe it to people as a group of people sitting around a table telling a story. You have worksheets to keep track of items, traits, hit points, weapons and other various things that help you character you created and are playing. There are dice involved, not just regular six sided dice that we are all used to but like ten and twenty sided ones that I had never seen nor did I know they existed until I started playing. You get as many people that you can and have a blast. You'll never know how fun it is until you try it once. He was big into Warhammer which is role playing but you buy and make the little figurines and the landscapes on which to play. This is all done on table top. I never got into playing the game but I loved sitting down and painting the figurines. He loves to read and between the two of us we have enough books to stock a small library. He doesn't dress in the latest fashions instead , he wears what he is comfortable in. So according to the stereotype of nerd, he fits the profile. What most don't know is that even though he is a guy and still has a little bit of those guy tendencies, he's an amazing husband. He's loving, caring, supportive and last but not least amazing in the sack!!!
The point I want to make here is, a lot of us girls don't give the "nerdy" guys a chance because they aren't popular, aren't always the handsomest and some are into stuff that we turn our noses up at because we are afraid to stray from the norm and try new things. So, we continue to push our loyal nerd guy friends off to the side and go for the "popular" guy. You know, handsome, athletic, six pack and an ego that rivals the size of Jupiter type of guy that ALWAYS breaks your heart. (mostly because his ego is the size of Jupiter!!) Then we wonder what we did wrong. What we did wrong is push the nice guy away (nerd) and go for what society tells us is beautiful. I have been hanging out with my husband and all of his friends for almost ten years and I don't think I have ever met a more friendly, loyal, and down to earth crowd in my life. They met me once and instantly they accepted me no questions asked and would be there for me if I ever needed anything. That's how it should be for everyone. This world would be a better place if we were all accepted for who we are and not who we should be.
I also know that those guys we consider nerds might not be the handsomest boys on the planet but if you find them sexy then who cares what other people think?? I used to be picked on all the time by a girl I used to work with about my husband. She didn't know what I saw in him. I didn't care. Yes he may be a red head with a temper to match, covered in freckles from head to toe, not have six pack abs and have a chest covered in hair, but I still find him irresistble. (and aren't real men supposed to have hairy chests and not shaved ones anyway??) As long as he's as fantastic as he is to me and I find him sexy, bullocks to what everyone else thinks. I have also come to find out that nerds can also be better lovers than your average man. They are more concerned with what they are doing and how they are making you feel rather than most guys who are in a race with you to have an orgasm and how they look doing it. Nerds, at least from my experience, like to make sure you are satisfied before they worry about themselves. They also like to cuddle. Now I want to reiterate that this doesn't cover all nerds and there are probably some out there that are just like your regular to average douchebag. I am only going by my experiences.
So in closing, in the words of Bob Dylan (well not exactly), all I am saying is give nerds a chance. You might be surprised at what you find......until next time......
Friday, February 3, 2012
Must Love Kids.....This one's for you Boys.....Pay Attention.
How many of you ladies out there are single moms? How many of you have found a great guy that you can connect with but as soon as they find out you have children they stop calling and just become someone you once knew? I haven't ever experienced this myself, but I have several friends that have. I'm sending this blog out to all you guys out there. Girls, if you are in a relationship with a man and had kids already when you two got together, make him read this.....it's gonna be full of some good stuff. So you go out one night, for the first time in what feels like forever because finding a babysitter is hell, to have a good time with your friends. On this venture you meet what you believe is a charming and handsome prince, you guys have a couple of drinks and exchange numbers so that you can get together again. Over the next few weeks you go out to dinner, movies and all the other things that two people getting to know each other do. After about the third or fourth date the topic that most guys try to avoid comes up and you make it known to him that you have a child (or children). One of two things at this point will happen, the chicken shit man will in so many words say its been nice knowing you but he's not the biggest child advocate. Then he will be a coward and not even give the relationship a chance. The brave man will accept this twist in his reality and tell you he wants to be with you despite the fact that you have kids and will want to eventually meet them. The hard part is finding the right time for this man to meet your little ones. You're excited that he has accepted you and your life that way it was dealt to you, but you are also apprehensive because of the attachment your children will feel for this man over time should everything between you two work out. If things don't work out and a break-up ensues, these tiny humans have no understanding for what happened. Break-ups for children can be devastating, they don't understand why mommy and this man they have come to admire can't live together and get along. All I can say is, if you are going to have this man meet your children make sure that you both agree that you are going to give the relationship a good try. To all of the men that were made to read this same goes for you, if you really think that you can make it work with this amazing woman then by all means discuss with her a good time and place to meet her little ones. You have to ease into it and be prepared for these tiny people to hate you and/or be really shy.
Now to all of you boys out there, make sure and I mean absolutely certain that meeting your girlfriends children is really what you want to do. Once you meet them and they warm up to you, (guaranteed that it will probably only take a couple of minutes) they are going to begin to look up to you and learn things from you. They are going to see you as a role model, someone that they can ask questions, someone to play games with and possibly a best friend. They will always have their biological father but depending on the circumstances between their mother and father, you are looking at being a big part of their lives. You have the opportunity to teach them different things, helping them with their homework, playing games with them and helping them with their problems if they want you to. If you and their father get into any arguments, and its bound to happen especially if you move in with their mother, don't let it get out of hand in front of the kids. It might hurt your pride to take the high road and keep your mouth shut but its more important for them to see you acting like a mature adult and handling things with out screaming, yelling, or violence. This same golden rule applies when you get into an argument with their mother. (Applies to you too ladies!!!) They are bound to see the two of you fight but keep it to a dull uproar. They are great receptors for stress and can feel it sometimes before we do, seeing two people they love fight and say hurtful things to each other gives them doubts of their place in the world. They begin to think that its because of them why you guys are fighting. If you know an argument is coming, wait until they go to bed and keep the yelling to a minimum so that they don hear you. Its better for them and in turn, better for you.
So in closing, ladies if you have children and are considering letting your boyfriend meet them don't make the decision lightly. If he keeps pressuring you, tell him to back off and explain the nature of the situation to him. Sometimes boys need things spelled out for them. Guys, if you have a girlfriend with children, give her time and let her be sure that meeting her kids is a good decision for them. She doesn't love you any less but she has one or more other people to think about besides herself, she want to be sure shes making good choices for them. Last but not least, I realize that all of this can be reversed and the guy can have the kids and the girlfriend wants to meet his children. All the same rules apply!!! Patience and good choices for these tiny humans is what is ultimately important. With that said.....until next time..........
Now to all of you boys out there, make sure and I mean absolutely certain that meeting your girlfriends children is really what you want to do. Once you meet them and they warm up to you, (guaranteed that it will probably only take a couple of minutes) they are going to begin to look up to you and learn things from you. They are going to see you as a role model, someone that they can ask questions, someone to play games with and possibly a best friend. They will always have their biological father but depending on the circumstances between their mother and father, you are looking at being a big part of their lives. You have the opportunity to teach them different things, helping them with their homework, playing games with them and helping them with their problems if they want you to. If you and their father get into any arguments, and its bound to happen especially if you move in with their mother, don't let it get out of hand in front of the kids. It might hurt your pride to take the high road and keep your mouth shut but its more important for them to see you acting like a mature adult and handling things with out screaming, yelling, or violence. This same golden rule applies when you get into an argument with their mother. (Applies to you too ladies!!!) They are bound to see the two of you fight but keep it to a dull uproar. They are great receptors for stress and can feel it sometimes before we do, seeing two people they love fight and say hurtful things to each other gives them doubts of their place in the world. They begin to think that its because of them why you guys are fighting. If you know an argument is coming, wait until they go to bed and keep the yelling to a minimum so that they don hear you. Its better for them and in turn, better for you.
So in closing, ladies if you have children and are considering letting your boyfriend meet them don't make the decision lightly. If he keeps pressuring you, tell him to back off and explain the nature of the situation to him. Sometimes boys need things spelled out for them. Guys, if you have a girlfriend with children, give her time and let her be sure that meeting her kids is a good decision for them. She doesn't love you any less but she has one or more other people to think about besides herself, she want to be sure shes making good choices for them. Last but not least, I realize that all of this can be reversed and the guy can have the kids and the girlfriend wants to meet his children. All the same rules apply!!! Patience and good choices for these tiny humans is what is ultimately important. With that said.....until next time..........
Thursday, January 26, 2012
SUUUUUUUPERRRRR FIIIIGGGGHHHHHTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!
The name of the title of this blog may be a little silly for the topic, but hey why can't we have some silly in our lives? I named it super fight because I'm going to get in to the differences between fighting as a dating couple and as a married couple. To those of you that read this regularly that aren't married: Yes there is a difference between the fights. Married fighting is waaaayyyy more interesting.
When you are in a long term relationship with someone there are bound to be fights. You have two people that iregardless how similar they are they still have alot of differences and when you get both parties in the same room on a bad day an argument will form. Angry words will be said, insults thrown, (along with maybe an inanimate object)and majority of the time the couple loses steam and forgets what they are arguing about. In that event they make up until the next argument where all of a sudden the topic of the previous fight rears its ugly head. The funny part about this is that originally the man (once again the term used loosly) will forget he topic of the fight which instigates the making up but when the new fight starts even weeks later he is the first one to bring up what the first fight was about. The answer to why this happens still baffels women all over the world. Men will forget birthdays, anniversarys, and other mundane activities but they will remember why you two argued about 6 months ago. This is besides the point and maybe a topic for another day, today we are going to get into married fighting and why its more fun than fighting when you're not married.
Couples that have been together for a couple of years but are unmarried fight just as much as everyone else. Arguing in a relationship is healthy as long as it doesn't get violent. They fight about work, paying bills, and other stupid little things that don't involve anything more intense than "he forgot to give me money for rent, therefore I hate him." I'm not saying that couple in a relationship doesn't really get into good fights but the topics start getting a little thin and neither party wants to bring anyhting real serious into the fight because the possibility of a break-up is always there. They usually keep the fights to being angry because the house is messy, not having enough money from the other individual to help pay the bills or boyfriend/girlfriend being out too late with their friends while the other stays home. The days long drag out fights where the couple spends a couple of days not speaking to the other is usually a good signal of the relationship coming to an end. A lot of couples end their years long courtships over one supermassive fight. Both parties take their things and go their seperate ways. Short, sweet, simple, done. Just like pulling off a band-aid. Married couples, its a completely different world.
When married people fight they fight over all the same stupid things that every other couple fights over but there are joint bank accounts and families involved. When you're married the fights usually don't result in any form of break-up unless there are adulterers present or there is violence. The days long drag out fights are marathons frought with mumbled insults, snide comments and other creative ways of torturing the other person with out actually looking at them or talking to them in any way. Sometimes us married folk even result to practical jokes to make the other person look as ridiculous as possible in front of other people with out those people even knowing that the married couple is arguing. Married people also have the ability to drag the other persons family into the argument. One of my favorite quotes by Jeff Foxworthy when he talked about this same topic was "well I guess we'll just live like your fat alcoholic mother then..." And oddly enough comments like that are not far from the truth. When married people run out of insults for the other person we immediatly turn on the others family. It doesn't matter if we love our in-laws they are usually the first ones on the chopping block and we work our way through the list of family members. We think of as many ridiculous insults that we can to not even prove a point but try to make our partner as angry as possible. Secretly I think we like to get a good heated argument going because when the apologies are handed out and we make up the make up sex is amazing. Most of us forget our inhabitions in the heat of the moment and will do some pretty crazy things that we will never admit to later on. So as you can see good things do happen because of fighting.
So in closing, as long as the fighting is productive its a good thing. (especially if there is make up sex involved!!!) And if you're married and you guys have already dragged the whole faily in then get creative. Come up with as many ridiculous insults that you can you guys might end up laughing instead of fighting!!! Until next week........
When you are in a long term relationship with someone there are bound to be fights. You have two people that iregardless how similar they are they still have alot of differences and when you get both parties in the same room on a bad day an argument will form. Angry words will be said, insults thrown, (along with maybe an inanimate object)and majority of the time the couple loses steam and forgets what they are arguing about. In that event they make up until the next argument where all of a sudden the topic of the previous fight rears its ugly head. The funny part about this is that originally the man (once again the term used loosly) will forget he topic of the fight which instigates the making up but when the new fight starts even weeks later he is the first one to bring up what the first fight was about. The answer to why this happens still baffels women all over the world. Men will forget birthdays, anniversarys, and other mundane activities but they will remember why you two argued about 6 months ago. This is besides the point and maybe a topic for another day, today we are going to get into married fighting and why its more fun than fighting when you're not married.
Couples that have been together for a couple of years but are unmarried fight just as much as everyone else. Arguing in a relationship is healthy as long as it doesn't get violent. They fight about work, paying bills, and other stupid little things that don't involve anything more intense than "he forgot to give me money for rent, therefore I hate him." I'm not saying that couple in a relationship doesn't really get into good fights but the topics start getting a little thin and neither party wants to bring anyhting real serious into the fight because the possibility of a break-up is always there. They usually keep the fights to being angry because the house is messy, not having enough money from the other individual to help pay the bills or boyfriend/girlfriend being out too late with their friends while the other stays home. The days long drag out fights where the couple spends a couple of days not speaking to the other is usually a good signal of the relationship coming to an end. A lot of couples end their years long courtships over one supermassive fight. Both parties take their things and go their seperate ways. Short, sweet, simple, done. Just like pulling off a band-aid. Married couples, its a completely different world.
When married people fight they fight over all the same stupid things that every other couple fights over but there are joint bank accounts and families involved. When you're married the fights usually don't result in any form of break-up unless there are adulterers present or there is violence. The days long drag out fights are marathons frought with mumbled insults, snide comments and other creative ways of torturing the other person with out actually looking at them or talking to them in any way. Sometimes us married folk even result to practical jokes to make the other person look as ridiculous as possible in front of other people with out those people even knowing that the married couple is arguing. Married people also have the ability to drag the other persons family into the argument. One of my favorite quotes by Jeff Foxworthy when he talked about this same topic was "well I guess we'll just live like your fat alcoholic mother then..." And oddly enough comments like that are not far from the truth. When married people run out of insults for the other person we immediatly turn on the others family. It doesn't matter if we love our in-laws they are usually the first ones on the chopping block and we work our way through the list of family members. We think of as many ridiculous insults that we can to not even prove a point but try to make our partner as angry as possible. Secretly I think we like to get a good heated argument going because when the apologies are handed out and we make up the make up sex is amazing. Most of us forget our inhabitions in the heat of the moment and will do some pretty crazy things that we will never admit to later on. So as you can see good things do happen because of fighting.
So in closing, as long as the fighting is productive its a good thing. (especially if there is make up sex involved!!!) And if you're married and you guys have already dragged the whole faily in then get creative. Come up with as many ridiculous insults that you can you guys might end up laughing instead of fighting!!! Until next week........
Tuesday, January 24, 2012
Have No Fear Super Mom Is Here!!!!!!!!!
To all of my regular readers, I am going to go a little off subject here, (normally I write about sex and relationships)this time its more about relationships. How many of you women out there are married? How many are married with children? How many of you married with children don't get a day off even if you are so sick that you can't move? I'm willing to bet the answer to the last question is going to be all of you. If this article offends any of the hardworking men in our lives, I don't mean to, I have just come to realize that a lot is expected out of women especially when we have kids.
The whole idea of this started when my co-worker and I were sitting at work one day when we both got called in early because everyone else was sick. (The person I am referring to was actually really sick and none of this applies to that individual we just came up with these ideas because of the situation.) Now, I know that calling in or going home and calling someone in to cover you when you are sick is proper work etiquette, I don't deny that that is the right thing to do so that everyone else and their family doesn't get sick from one person. What I have noticed it that most of the time its the men calling in when they have a sore throat or a cold, but when women are sick we only call in to work when we are almost literally on our death beds. A sniffle to us is like a butterfly disturbing an elephant, only mildly annoying. A sniffle to a man usually signals the end of the world. A full blown cold is like Armageddon. We sat and thought at work that day why that is and have come to realize that women have to be tough. We were created to have the ability to go through nine (or ten) months carrying a human in our bodies and then giving that human life in the birthing process. We were imbued with the curse of having a monthly menstrual cycle to where on average we bleed for five days and just have to put up with it. Let's not forget the mind numbing cramps that go along with the ever constant discomfort of having a period. We clean, take care of the children, work, and try to maintain a happy healthy household. We don't do it because we have to we do it because we want to. Men could never deal with half of the things that women go through. Our monthly cycle alone would put a man in a crumpled lump on the floor whining and that would only be the first day. Women, we pop a midol or other over the counter medication to help ease the pain and discomfort and go on about our day with minimal amount of complaining. We were built to be tough and withstand most anything. We don't let much get in our way. Even on our day off, we don't get the day off. I don't know about you but my days off of work consist of cleaning, organizing and taking care of my almost two year old little guy. Its not because I have to do it but because I want to. My husband helps and is more than happy to help, but as I am sure most of you know we all have our ways of cleaning and doing things and sometimes those boys of ours just don't do it the way we want it done. Its the same with taking care of the little ones. Our husbands/boyfriends help with the rearing of the children but as every woman knows until our kids reach the age of 3 or 4 the only person they want to be with is mommy. So on top of housework we also have a tiny human hanging on our every action.
I don't want this to sound like I am doing any kind of man bashing because I'm not. I love my husband and in the 8 years we have been together he has made me a stronger and wiser person. He understands me and everything about me, but he also says repeatedly that women are crazy. I tell him that if men had to deal with all the responsibilities of a woman that they would probably be crazy too and with a moment of thought he usually nods his head in agreement. So I am going to end this shorter entry with this: Boys, next time you think that your wife/girlfriend is going bat shit crazy over nothing, think about what she has to go through every day. Be thankful that the woman in your life is there to help you, be there for you, and love her the way she deserves to be loved. Until next time..........
The whole idea of this started when my co-worker and I were sitting at work one day when we both got called in early because everyone else was sick. (The person I am referring to was actually really sick and none of this applies to that individual we just came up with these ideas because of the situation.) Now, I know that calling in or going home and calling someone in to cover you when you are sick is proper work etiquette, I don't deny that that is the right thing to do so that everyone else and their family doesn't get sick from one person. What I have noticed it that most of the time its the men calling in when they have a sore throat or a cold, but when women are sick we only call in to work when we are almost literally on our death beds. A sniffle to us is like a butterfly disturbing an elephant, only mildly annoying. A sniffle to a man usually signals the end of the world. A full blown cold is like Armageddon. We sat and thought at work that day why that is and have come to realize that women have to be tough. We were created to have the ability to go through nine (or ten) months carrying a human in our bodies and then giving that human life in the birthing process. We were imbued with the curse of having a monthly menstrual cycle to where on average we bleed for five days and just have to put up with it. Let's not forget the mind numbing cramps that go along with the ever constant discomfort of having a period. We clean, take care of the children, work, and try to maintain a happy healthy household. We don't do it because we have to we do it because we want to. Men could never deal with half of the things that women go through. Our monthly cycle alone would put a man in a crumpled lump on the floor whining and that would only be the first day. Women, we pop a midol or other over the counter medication to help ease the pain and discomfort and go on about our day with minimal amount of complaining. We were built to be tough and withstand most anything. We don't let much get in our way. Even on our day off, we don't get the day off. I don't know about you but my days off of work consist of cleaning, organizing and taking care of my almost two year old little guy. Its not because I have to do it but because I want to. My husband helps and is more than happy to help, but as I am sure most of you know we all have our ways of cleaning and doing things and sometimes those boys of ours just don't do it the way we want it done. Its the same with taking care of the little ones. Our husbands/boyfriends help with the rearing of the children but as every woman knows until our kids reach the age of 3 or 4 the only person they want to be with is mommy. So on top of housework we also have a tiny human hanging on our every action.
I don't want this to sound like I am doing any kind of man bashing because I'm not. I love my husband and in the 8 years we have been together he has made me a stronger and wiser person. He understands me and everything about me, but he also says repeatedly that women are crazy. I tell him that if men had to deal with all the responsibilities of a woman that they would probably be crazy too and with a moment of thought he usually nods his head in agreement. So I am going to end this shorter entry with this: Boys, next time you think that your wife/girlfriend is going bat shit crazy over nothing, think about what she has to go through every day. Be thankful that the woman in your life is there to help you, be there for you, and love her the way she deserves to be loved. Until next time..........
Monday, January 9, 2012
The Pornstar Girlfriend
Most of you right now are probably reading that title and thinking,"WHAT?" I warned you all in the beginning that the entries were going to get a little racy and I fully plan to hold up to that promise. Fist of all, don't take the title lliterally. Your husband/boyfriend does not have some girl stashed off to the side. (If he does then you have my full permission to kick his ass.) This is all about the one thing that every guy does and none of the women will admit that they know about, masturbation and porn. Now, I don't want to imply that women never do, we all do whether we want to admit it or not, but I am going to put out there that men do it waaaaaayyyyyyyy more than women do. (Unless you're like Samantha from Sex in the City....) If you can just get your head around the fact that it happens then all will be okay.
I'm going to start off by saying that masturbation is a perfectly normal and healthy thing and at some point and time in every one's lives we have all done it at least once. If you say you never have then, you are either lying or you are just too weirded out by the idea and have been to scared to try. I'm putting money on the lie part. You also shouldn't be embarrassed by it. Its a wonderful thing, a good stress reliever, help you fall asleep when you can't sleep, or if you're having a bad day it can make it A LOT better. I also believe that men pretty much hold the monopoly on this action. Most women can do it and then not do it again for weeks or even months, with men, its an almost everyday event. The funny part is depending on the relationship they have with their wife/girlfriend they will totally deny doing it as much as they do until they get caught. I will also guarantee that at some point they will get caught by you, to which some of them will still deny it. If you catch your man, don't get angry. They will probably be embarrassed enough that they really don't need the extra humiliation of a fight over it. They don't love you any less and they don't find you any less attractive its just what guys do.
The next thing I'm going to mention is usually where the fight starts about masturbation. Porn. Every man has a collection of porn. EVERY MAN. Even if they say they don't they do and they have just hidden it so well that you will never find it or stashed it at a friends house so you won't see it. Just keep in mind that it exists. I can imagine right now I have a bunch of women reading this shaking their heads thinking that their man doesn't have one. Trust me they do. When women masturbate they can usually use their imagination to get them to the finish line, men, they need the visual stimulation to get them to that same place. Its not necessarily that they are attracted to the women on the computer or TV screen, but the change of scenery and the action on the screen. Seriously ladies, let's face it, most of us are soooo not willing to do half of the things that happen in the adult flicks that our significant others are watching. (you know its the truth, have you ever watched one of those?) Some women find a great offense to this collection and once they get married they make their new hubby's get rid of their porn star girlfriends with the thought that they should be enough. They are fine to think that but with men porn doesn't translate into "my wife isn't good enough therefore I have to watch naked chicks get it on on DVD "its more of just "oohhh look boobs I haven't seen before". They don't love you any less. Men are instinctive creatures that have the need and desire to stick their penis into just about anything they can. Watching and masturbating to porn quenches this instinctive thirst that they have to run out and bone anything and everyone. If that gets taken away from them unwillingly then they have more of a tendency to find another way to quench that thirst. (we all know what that means right?) So next time you find that porn stash or catch your husband/boyfriend in the act, either let it go or just make it known that he needs to find a better time and place. (if it makes you uncomfortable. out of sight out of mind.) If you find it one of the most sexiest encounters you have ever come across then be sure to let him know. Open and honest is always the best policy.
So when you wake up at three in the morning and your significant other is mysteriously missing and you can see the glow of the TV from the other room....give the man some privacy and let him do his thing. It will make him happier, it will make the relationship happier and always know that he still loves you as much as he did before you found out about all of this and if you are understanding about it he will love you more for it. So long as you are still getting good lovin's on a regular basis and masturbation hasn't taken over your sex life, let it go and enjoy the man for who he is......until next week........
I'm going to start off by saying that masturbation is a perfectly normal and healthy thing and at some point and time in every one's lives we have all done it at least once. If you say you never have then, you are either lying or you are just too weirded out by the idea and have been to scared to try. I'm putting money on the lie part. You also shouldn't be embarrassed by it. Its a wonderful thing, a good stress reliever, help you fall asleep when you can't sleep, or if you're having a bad day it can make it A LOT better. I also believe that men pretty much hold the monopoly on this action. Most women can do it and then not do it again for weeks or even months, with men, its an almost everyday event. The funny part is depending on the relationship they have with their wife/girlfriend they will totally deny doing it as much as they do until they get caught. I will also guarantee that at some point they will get caught by you, to which some of them will still deny it. If you catch your man, don't get angry. They will probably be embarrassed enough that they really don't need the extra humiliation of a fight over it. They don't love you any less and they don't find you any less attractive its just what guys do.
The next thing I'm going to mention is usually where the fight starts about masturbation. Porn. Every man has a collection of porn. EVERY MAN. Even if they say they don't they do and they have just hidden it so well that you will never find it or stashed it at a friends house so you won't see it. Just keep in mind that it exists. I can imagine right now I have a bunch of women reading this shaking their heads thinking that their man doesn't have one. Trust me they do. When women masturbate they can usually use their imagination to get them to the finish line, men, they need the visual stimulation to get them to that same place. Its not necessarily that they are attracted to the women on the computer or TV screen, but the change of scenery and the action on the screen. Seriously ladies, let's face it, most of us are soooo not willing to do half of the things that happen in the adult flicks that our significant others are watching. (you know its the truth, have you ever watched one of those?) Some women find a great offense to this collection and once they get married they make their new hubby's get rid of their porn star girlfriends with the thought that they should be enough. They are fine to think that but with men porn doesn't translate into "my wife isn't good enough therefore I have to watch naked chicks get it on on DVD "its more of just "oohhh look boobs I haven't seen before". They don't love you any less. Men are instinctive creatures that have the need and desire to stick their penis into just about anything they can. Watching and masturbating to porn quenches this instinctive thirst that they have to run out and bone anything and everyone. If that gets taken away from them unwillingly then they have more of a tendency to find another way to quench that thirst. (we all know what that means right?) So next time you find that porn stash or catch your husband/boyfriend in the act, either let it go or just make it known that he needs to find a better time and place. (if it makes you uncomfortable. out of sight out of mind.) If you find it one of the most sexiest encounters you have ever come across then be sure to let him know. Open and honest is always the best policy.
So when you wake up at three in the morning and your significant other is mysteriously missing and you can see the glow of the TV from the other room....give the man some privacy and let him do his thing. It will make him happier, it will make the relationship happier and always know that he still loves you as much as he did before you found out about all of this and if you are understanding about it he will love you more for it. So long as you are still getting good lovin's on a regular basis and masturbation hasn't taken over your sex life, let it go and enjoy the man for who he is......until next week........
Thursday, January 5, 2012
To Three or Not To Three?......The Ultimate question.
Most of us, as women, have heard this question more than once in just about every relationship we have had and have politely patted our silly significant other on the head kissed his nose and brushed it off. What I want to know is have any of you out there ever really seriously sat down and talked about it?? Have you ever sat down with your boy and talked about the possibilities of entering a third into your sex life? ( I warned you guys in the first entry of this blog that the topics would get racy.) I have and even though I haven't gone through with it, (nor do I think I ever will.) there are A LOT of things to take into account and to really consider.
OK, so I know that most, if not all, of the time its usually our boys that come up with the idea of a threesome. Most of the time they are joking around and only mention it so get a rise out of us because they know that its a kind of taboo subject. Then there are those select few that are totally serious. They have fantasized about it enough to know that its something that they want to try and they will keep dropping hints towards it. It's also something that can be easily pushed to the back burner and discussed at a later date if you both choose to do so. I have realized that its usually guys that do the threesome fantasizing and its usually the girls that push it to the back burner. If you do decide to have a serious discussion about a threesome whether you are actually going to have one or not, make sure that you are truthful about what you want and how you want it to happen. I don't think there is anything worse than setting expectations under false pretenses and then realizing it wasn't what you wanted. The situation is going to be weird enough as it is try to make it as comfortable as possible by expressing what you really want and not what you think he wants. ( Even if all you ever do is just talk about it.)
The first thing that you definitely going to want to be clear about is who the third will be. The first thing he's gonna do is probably pick the hottest friend you have and drop her name. This will of course get a reaction out of you that will cause him physical harm in some way. (punch in the shoulder, smack in the back of the head....) But then consider it......depending on the relationship between you and the aforementioned individual they may be a candidate. It all really depends on if you want that person to be someone that you know and trust or a complete and total stranger. It also depends on if you plan on the three of you getting together again in the future. My personal opinion, if its going to happen more than once a friend may be a good choice but just keep in mind that this person is your friend and you will be hanging out with them after said event. If its just a one time affair then maybe someone you don't know as well but they are an acquaintance. Don't ever go for a complete stranger because God only know what repercussions may follow that idea. (Seriously you could end up with a complete and total psycho and be ax murdered)
The second thing you are going to want to do after you have decided to bring this fantasy to life is set some ground rules between the three of you. Be very open and honest because as I have already stated there is nothing worse than setting expectations and have them not hold up to what you wanted. If you are married and you are bringing a third into the mix, this is very important. A miscommunication can ruin marriages and friendships. Make sure you express what you want to happen and how you want it to happen so that the only unexpected is that you like it more than you thought you would. (It can happen!!!) Depending on the person the couple decides to "three" with, rules should be set if two of the three are already friends. What those rules happen to be, well, that's up to the the three involved. As long as there is an understanding that there are rules set and they should be followed unless all involved talk about any changes that want to be made.
And the last thing is......enjoy yourself. If you have gotten to the point that all the decisions have been made and the three of you have laid down all the rules, try it out. There is nothing wrong with changing your mind and calling the whole thing off but don't immediately stop everything and get into a cat fight with your best friend because she kissed your boyfriend/husband during the event. Try it out, let your inhibitions go, and see what happens. Who knows you might like it and want to try it again or you won't and you never have to do it again. Sex is a very beautiful thing and sometimes sharing it with more than one other person can be an enlightening experience. You may also find out that its not for you and the only other person you want to share your body with is your boyfriend/husband. There is nothing wrong with that and nothing wrong in exploring your sexuality. Whats good for one person may not be good for another.
So with all that said I will say again that these are my personal opinions and its up to you to listen to them or not. Until next time my readers.....
OK, so I know that most, if not all, of the time its usually our boys that come up with the idea of a threesome. Most of the time they are joking around and only mention it so get a rise out of us because they know that its a kind of taboo subject. Then there are those select few that are totally serious. They have fantasized about it enough to know that its something that they want to try and they will keep dropping hints towards it. It's also something that can be easily pushed to the back burner and discussed at a later date if you both choose to do so. I have realized that its usually guys that do the threesome fantasizing and its usually the girls that push it to the back burner. If you do decide to have a serious discussion about a threesome whether you are actually going to have one or not, make sure that you are truthful about what you want and how you want it to happen. I don't think there is anything worse than setting expectations under false pretenses and then realizing it wasn't what you wanted. The situation is going to be weird enough as it is try to make it as comfortable as possible by expressing what you really want and not what you think he wants. ( Even if all you ever do is just talk about it.)
The first thing that you definitely going to want to be clear about is who the third will be. The first thing he's gonna do is probably pick the hottest friend you have and drop her name. This will of course get a reaction out of you that will cause him physical harm in some way. (punch in the shoulder, smack in the back of the head....) But then consider it......depending on the relationship between you and the aforementioned individual they may be a candidate. It all really depends on if you want that person to be someone that you know and trust or a complete and total stranger. It also depends on if you plan on the three of you getting together again in the future. My personal opinion, if its going to happen more than once a friend may be a good choice but just keep in mind that this person is your friend and you will be hanging out with them after said event. If its just a one time affair then maybe someone you don't know as well but they are an acquaintance. Don't ever go for a complete stranger because God only know what repercussions may follow that idea. (Seriously you could end up with a complete and total psycho and be ax murdered)
The second thing you are going to want to do after you have decided to bring this fantasy to life is set some ground rules between the three of you. Be very open and honest because as I have already stated there is nothing worse than setting expectations and have them not hold up to what you wanted. If you are married and you are bringing a third into the mix, this is very important. A miscommunication can ruin marriages and friendships. Make sure you express what you want to happen and how you want it to happen so that the only unexpected is that you like it more than you thought you would. (It can happen!!!) Depending on the person the couple decides to "three" with, rules should be set if two of the three are already friends. What those rules happen to be, well, that's up to the the three involved. As long as there is an understanding that there are rules set and they should be followed unless all involved talk about any changes that want to be made.
And the last thing is......enjoy yourself. If you have gotten to the point that all the decisions have been made and the three of you have laid down all the rules, try it out. There is nothing wrong with changing your mind and calling the whole thing off but don't immediately stop everything and get into a cat fight with your best friend because she kissed your boyfriend/husband during the event. Try it out, let your inhibitions go, and see what happens. Who knows you might like it and want to try it again or you won't and you never have to do it again. Sex is a very beautiful thing and sometimes sharing it with more than one other person can be an enlightening experience. You may also find out that its not for you and the only other person you want to share your body with is your boyfriend/husband. There is nothing wrong with that and nothing wrong in exploring your sexuality. Whats good for one person may not be good for another.
So with all that said I will say again that these are my personal opinions and its up to you to listen to them or not. Until next time my readers.....
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